#metoo And The Rumbling In My Bones

 They’re falling like flies.  It’s been a long time coming and each and every one of those perpetrators deserves what is coming to him.   The collective disclosures from those victimized have created an epic story about money and power and the insidious sexist culture we live in.  The plot line includes money, fame, sex, politics, and secrecy. It has captured our attention the same way headlines on celebrity tabloids do when we are standing in line at the grocery store.

These recent events lead to the resurrection of the #metoo movement and became a vehicle whereby celebrities courageously disclosed their own #metoo experiences. This in turn empowered regular everyday women to add their experiences of sexual violence to those of the rich and famous by using the hashtag.  Facebook and Twitter were flooded.  The snowball was rolling and notorious perpetrators became rolled into it as it barrelled down a steep mountain.  With the increasing speed these sexual predators realized there was no way to slither their way out and eventually acquiesced to the inevitable - being ousted, fired, and forced into resignation from positions that previously bestowed upon them the designation of beloved public figures.

As the demise of these men became front and center, women celebrated the long awaited justice and the freedom that comes with it.  Facebook and Twitter ads linked women and their allies to websites where they could proudly buy women power themed stickers, t-shirts, mugs, and jewelry. Who knew that bringing down powerful men could create a niche business?  There are times I wonder if there are people who think this is the first time high profile sexual violence has flooded the media. 

Something about all of this unsettles me.  My head tells me I should be thrilled about a movement that raises awareness and has resulted in sex offenders, who for so long were able to garner the social, monetary, and political clout to justify and hide their criminal behavior, to be held accountable.  My heart and gut are rumbling, which may be a warning to not put too much stock in this.  Honestly, I feel awful about this rumbling.  I want to be joyous and celebrate these victories.  Heaven knows I’ve rushed to Amazon to buy my feminist gear and restate my allegiance to equality.

I need to unpack what is so unsettling, hence this blog.  Its true that I have been sitting with this for a while, but with the announcement naming the Silence Breakers as Time’s Person of the Year the rumbling got deeper and I knew it was important to work this out.  I’m guessing what I have to say may not be popular, or be considered a buzz kill, and I’ll accept that criticism.  To put things in context:

• Let’s not forget all of the Silence Breakers who over the past several decades paved the path for others to come forward.  Without the faceless survivors that never made the news as heroes, it wouldn’t be possible for others to carry the torch today.

• It isn’t any more courageous to speak out about Harvey Weinstein, Matt Lauer, Al Franken, or Donald Trump than it is about your shift leader at the local Applebees or Walmart, but when have those disclosures caused such a stir as what we are seeing today?  Think about it.  Is the horror of sexual violence against any of these women any less difficult than it is for those that have captured our attention today?  To me, it shouldn’t matter who the victims are, we should be outraged that this happens at all. 

Let’s not forget the army of women who for decades dedicated their lives to achieving equality and ending men’s violence against women.  Groundbreaking federal and state laws have been passed, countless marches have been organized, media campaigns have been implemented, advocates have bore witness to thousands of survivor stories, and prevention programs have infiltrated schools.  All of this has required deep reservoirs of courage and perseverance not to mention the character to withstand criticism and name calling.

• Let’s be careful to not glorify men who have stepped up to do and say what’s right.  Case in point, Billy Bush’s recent New YorkTimes Op-ed.  It’s true that cultural norms can make it difficult to step outside of the box, but we have to question why so many good men have been complicit bystanders while armies of women have been tireless in raising issues about men’s criminal behavior.

Sexual violence is about complex inequality perpetuated through societal structures that ensure the seat of power remains in the hands of a those with privilege. That privilege is based on race, class, and gender.  Simply put (sort of), sexual violence is one of many tools used to disempower women and other vulnerable populations from acquiring equal access to resources, money, housing, safety, jobs, education … just to name a few. Sexual violence doesn’t exist in a vacuum; it exists as part of an intricate system of disempowerment.

 So what does all of this have to do with #metoo, Harvey Weinstein, the Silence Breakers and the rumbling in my gut?  Here’s what I’ve come to so far, and I reserve the right to reassess at a later date.  These recent events and the attention they’ve achieved represents only a tiny step forward, in part, because of decades of work that paved the way for this moment to occur.  It’s great to celebrate the victories, but just because the mostly white and famous have come forward to ignite this excitement doesn’t mean our work is done.  I’ve done this work for too long to be naïve about what this progress means. It means we MUST NOT let the excitement of this bandwagon cloud what else we have to do. The rumbling in my gut and the unsettling in my bones tells me we have to remain resolute and not squander this opportunity to address the root causes that allow this type of violence to occur. Please know I more and more people to join the brave #metoo revolution, get a tattoo of Rosie the Riveter, wear a pussy hat, be a nasty woman, but mostly my hope is we will follow Elizabeth Warren’s lead and keep persisting.   

Welcome to the marathon.